Losing Contact
I am about to lose contact with some people I love very dearly. It happens every year at this time when you are affiliated with academia. Those young, bright adults that only yesterday came to college because it was just the next thing to do in life, now, somehow, say they are prepared to take on their own mission in life. And it is such a gift to get to watch them, to be inspired by their youthful optimism and unencumbered freedom, to dream with them about what could be and where they will leave their mark in this world.
Ignatius directs us to hold all the gifts of God gently. I know wanting them to stay, to not grow up, is my attachment, not of God. They are called. And I must acknowledge the gift of sharing their path if only for a short while. Breath deep. Hold back a tear. And trust. Trust that over the last four years they have sprouted roots in solidarity, justice, compassion, and knowledge strong enough to withstand a society that will constantly blow hurricane force winds against those beliefs. Trust that there are others out there who will continue to guide them. Trust that they know they can always call home.
“Losing contact” though is an awkward thing in this day and age. Years ago it was legit to not have someone’s phone number or address; now we will remain virtually connected across the globe. With all our technology we truly have the capacity to live our lives in almost constant contact with others virtually anywhere. So really, I don’t ever have to say goodbye. “We” can live on via email forever. I wonder what Ignatius would say about trying to do so.
I think he would say that we need to first acknowledge the gift that we have in our friendship. Here and now. I don’t know what the future holds for either of us so let me take a moment, here and now, to thank you for the gift you have been to me. Name it. Celebrate it. Wallow in it for just bit.
Then I think he would say, regarding staying in contact, we ought to use technology in as much as it helps us on our end to respond to God’s love, and rid ourselves of it so far as it hinders us in responding to God’s love. If by staying in contact with me, you are not being fully present to those in your daily life now, you will be missing out on the presence of God in them, and they will miss out on experiencing it in you—and I know it is so fully present in you. You need to be fully present there in this next phase of your life. That is where God needs of you. That is what I want for you.
And then I think he would say what his own college friend, Francis Xavier, said to him when he recognized his call to live so far away from his mentor and dear friend:
If the Lord Our God has separated us by these vast distances, we are still united by our awareness of these strong bonds that unite us in a single spirit and a common love. Since, if I have judged aright, neither physical separation, nor estrangement, nor forgetfulness can have any meaning for those who love another in the Lord. For it seems to me that we shall always sustain each other as we were ever wont to do before.
“We” don’t have to live on via email or texting or facebook. “We” live on in our Oneness with Christ. And in that, we will never lose contact.
Photo: “forcing a smile & waving goodbye” by PappaJack from Flickr (Used under Creative Commons license)
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